the root of all evil

...in my life is stress and psychic trouble. I don't show it and I have enough stamina to resist it for a long time. But evil starts showing its thorns little by liltte. I am irritable and nervous, I am not judging right, I am impulsive (and in a bad way), I talk back and I am always tired as hell, no matter how much sleep I get. But it's all like a circle of vices, one thing leads to another....I have to find a place to live with a smaller rent (that's because I can't buy a house, no way Jose), a rent I can afford, coz I realised that I've been going for too long with this stress every month. Or maybe to find a better-paid job. But I guess on Friday I had the first major failure of my life: I went to this interview, it was ok, I did ok, or at least that's what I thought, and they didn't call me.... I was 80% they'll hire me, I found the job perfect for me. Then I thought maybe I asked for too much money...this is also possible. It didn't depress me in a conscious way, but I think the bad influence of this failure is there somewhere and acts incognito in my mind....
I saw this movie...."Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind"....pretty weird, I liked it, I got the picture....and I didn't have to see that movie to know that even if you try to erase the conscient memory of a person from your mind, you could never erase the emotional memory, the tactile memory even. And no matter my memories, good or bad, they are mine, they are part of me and in them resides that past-Miruna I sometimes hate or like....but it's Miruna...
Well I guess the world didn't need my comment on this movie :)), I nevertheless delivered it, because it's my blog, I write whatever I want in here. Like in a vault. Not throw away the key yet:).

P.S. - Thank you for the positive considerations on my blog. It's not much and I decided not to write for the writing, but for the self, or better yet it's a writing with a catharsis function. So please don't criticise too much the style, just read between the lines.